Living in the *Now*

Straying away from the usual fitness/food format to talk about something that is near and dear to me. 

A forever "goal" of mine has been to not be so anxious.
You mean that's an option?
It is. Although I don't "live there" often -- I think I've gotten much better over the past...6-8 months or so. HOWEVER --- since the school semester has started, everything's gone a little bit... haywire? off the map? to crazy town? yeah...you could say that.

Is this even possible? 

Where will I live after graduation? Shit, I'm going to have to move again? Who will help me pack? Wait...when's graduation? What color is my cap and gown? How much is it? What size will my diploma be? How soon do I need to study for the LMSW exam? What state will I need to be licensed in? Can I quit one of my several jobs? Speaking of jobs..what kind will I get? What kind do I want? I wonder how much I'll make? When do I need to start paying on my student loans...

This. Is. Exhausting. 

And you know what else it is? POINTLESS. There is NO way that worrying about all of this NOW is going to change the reality of it being done. I know that I'm a dedicated, structured person. I don't wait until the last minute. But planning 10 months in advance is a little overzealous.

So, how? How to I reeeeeeeel myself back in? Well, I exercise. As often as I can. Whenever I can. This was rough as I had a stress fracture and no gym, so my options were limited, but I made do. I am now back to running 3x a week and yoga-ing 3x a week. Running is honestly something that I can't ever imagine NOT doing. It's as soothing to me as a massage. With sweat.


Yoga -- God's most recent gift to me. While I've been doing it since I moved off and on, I have just really started to benefit in a more emotional way. This is the body I have. I'm learning to be kinder to myself, love and accept myself the way that I am *right now* I'm seeing my body change in great ways, but my favorite change is the change I have on the inside. Practicing self-compassion is not something I've ever been very good at.  Also, forcing myself to lay still and think of nothing for at least 3 minutes before and after practice helps quiet my loud-mouthed mind :)

Pray.  Now I will admit this is something that falls by the wayside from time to time, but I am typically ever-aware of all of my blessings, and try to focus on those instead of what I think I want or need. This helps keep me grounded and appreciative of this little life of mine.

Hold myself accountable. I have a few great friends who will tell me when to snap out of it. Who pray for me. Tell me when to get off that thought train, as I refer to it as after a wise woman said it. Another fun thing I tell myself is,"welp, that's a thought that will take me places..." Because honestly, half the nonsense we think that grows into fear/worry/anxiety/whatever....it's grown from something so small.

Self-help aficionado. Yeah, that's right. I'm a lover of self-help, feel-good, mindfulness type books. It doesn't work for everyone, but I also use these things at my internship, and hell...if I can't practice what I preach then I'm in for a realllll treat when clients start calling my BS. So, don't be scurred. Pick up a book. Or an audio book, for those of you who do that. Listen to it on a commute, on a run, wherever. They aren't as cliche as you think. Ok...they are, but you might like it :)

These are actually for my internship, but they're also self-help-ish.

Be. Silly. Man this is so hard for me. 

This was me actually trying to match an iPhone emoji...but it totally fits here. 

I am SUCH a serious person. The phrase "lighten up" or "live a little" should be written on my gravestone. Except that's not very sensitive...so maybe not. But, taking the time to laugh and appreciate the feeling it brings to my face, my body, my stomach...is not something I do often enough. But, it's hard to be anxious when you're laughing. Just try it. It's a little like sneezing with your eyes open. AKA impossible. 

Lastly, ENJOY. ENJOY. ENJOY. Any little thing. It doesn't even matter.

Sunflowers. Giant ones.

Lazy days. He's a pro at these.

Fall. Scarves. All things pumpkin and cinnamon.


Until next time -- I'll be trying to relax :) Probably by the time I blog next I will have been to Texas and Minneapolis -- so expect some fun photos :) 

Everything Summer (Recap in Fast Forward)

Wow blog world. I've been absent :) Summertime is  almost over, and I haven't wanted to miss a beat!! Hence my absence. :) Lo siento!

All things Texas: Sunshine, dirt roads, family, graduation, friends, beer, grill, pets. I mean, need I elaborate? Our family is growing up and transitioning to something different, which will take some adjusting. My youngest brother graduated, so pretty soon we will all be out of the house
 *woah* It's such a blessing to see my sweet brothers grow up and become men.
How strange is that? My "little" brothers aren't so little, and it's so great to see our relationships grow and deepen. Can't imagine not having those crazies.

All things Florida: One of my favorite family vacations. We truly enjoyed each other and it was such a blessing to have my partner join in on the family fun this year, as well as Devin, my brothers' partner. While it was different to be missing the WHOLE fam, it was great to relax just us 5 and reconnect. We saw some dolphins, watched Shark Week, saw a sea turtle, kayaked, I ran in the rain, and we slept a lottttt. Sound perfect? It was. :)


Running: WELLLLLLLP. I was training for the Twin Cities Marathon, and I suffered a stress fracture. Right after 14 miles. *sob story* I was doing great with my training and had read some really great books on eating for running and Ha's marathon guide. However, since then I've been doing yoga (namasteeeee) and riding my bike some and cutting back on my runs dramatically.
Dramatically = one run a week, 3-4 miles max. Since the first week in August. *ouch* I'm slowly adding in more runs but experiencing soreness in my R leg fibula, so I just listen to my body and adjust as necessary.

Really stinks. But, I am excited to be getting back to it. Fall is my favorite running season, anyhow <3
I'm still headed to MSP for the race to support my friend Kelly and run the last 5-6 with her, and spend some fun quality time with my parents and P-I-C (partner in crime). Really looking forward to it! I just got a new running belt since my last one was acting crazy, and I got a sweat belt to maybe help shed some extra inches in the belly. If not, oh well, it is supposed to support better breathing and posture, so I'll be trying that out the next few weeks!

In other news -- Michael got a new job -- so no more overseas traveling! Exciting stuff. That's all about that.

This semester is going to be exciting and packed -- and I am so excited to be starting my last year as a graduate student at MSU. #gogreen
I'm interning at the Michigan State University Counseling Center and have been there since the beginning of July. I have been learning so much and really enjoying the experience. I'll be there for the year! I'll also be waiting tables once a week, working as a nanny, and doing a work study at the East Lansing Hot Yoga studio that I LOVELOVELOVE in exchange for free yoga practice. While this is a very busy time for me, I am focused on being present in each day, and allowing myself to love this time, as come May it will be over, and I will then miss it. Such is life.

I realize I am LATEEE to this gem of a show, but The Newsroom, anyone?! Hello, my new favorite show. Just started Season One and officially in love. I wish I wasn't, because I have papers to write, but this show is seriously good.

Marathon Training: Week 1

Ok, ladies and gents! I've started my training :) I was going to wait another week but I was getting anxious, and the first week is light, so I went ahead and started it. I've tried to develop a phrase from my group therapy class that I love -- Go forward with relaxed intent.

Key word: relaxed intent. 
This is fun -- not a super stressful thing that I beat myself up over if I have a less-than-stellar run or I'm not feeling it one morning and my run ends up being a little short or whatever. The idea behind relaxed intent is that I will enjoy it, try to reduce stress over it because this is elective, joyful, and exciting. Something I (mostly) enjoy. A bucket-list goal. An insane decision that makes me feel like I'm a little bit unstable --- but whatever :) I'm not the only crazy one, and if I'm gonna be nuts, why not be fit, too? (: Yes, these things actually go through my head...
Anyway -  why freak out and give myself an added stress when the Lord knows I have plenty of other things to be stressing about.

Love this. 

In the single digits away from being in the beautiful land of Texas :) God's country, as we like to say :)
I cannot waittttttttttt. The joy my family (both given and chosen) brings me is nothing that I could ever describe in words. I am SO thankful - every day - to have them. Also so excited to visit my home church. I haven't been there *in the flesh* since last Christmas.
Very fun. Excitingggg.

Not so exciting? The bf is in Norway. While it's a 7 hour time difference, the pictures I've seen are GORGEOUS and I'm beyond jealous. :/ I'm getting pictures like this:

(going to the grocery store has never looked so glamorous)
Sup Norway?!

Anywho-
This is what I'll be doing for the next 16 weeks (:
Hal Higdon's plan for Marathon training (Novice 2)

So excited to get started on this!
Anyone who is doing a marathon HAS to read Marathon by Hal Hidgon. It is the BEST motivator and has some really great advice. I will forever be a fan of Hal. His system works, y'all.


Got some Clif Shots to try out, as they'll be the sponsored gel at the Twin Cities Marathon. I also got some Honey Stinger waffles and chews (previously written about) and I think I got another thing to try. I need to get some Powerade Ion 4, as that's the sports drink they'll provide. AND after research and lots of positive reviews, I got some compression socks. I'll let you know how I like them. My sweet friend Jodi gave me a heads up on a sale from pro compression so I got them 40% off! whaaatyessss.

I'm also implementing these diet changes starting this week from Matt Fitzgerald's book that I read, The New Nutrition Guide for Marathoners and Half-Marathoners. I would definitely recommend it for anyone that is super active. The "plan" isn't a "diet" but a way to look at food and nutrition for the rest of your life. I just really resonated with it. To start, I've got this DELISH dinner to appease my weekly pizza craving iaintmadatchaaa

ANDDDD --- I cut all my hair off. Again (:

#shorthairdontcare
#teenytinyponyhair (Erynn's word for ponytail. I now talk like I'm 2 years old).


Off to watch Dateline. Don't hate. I know I sound like an old woman.
I have 6 miles tomorrow, and then work work work.
Happy weekend, y'all! 

Mental Marathon Prepping Step One: Research.

Holy running. 

If you -- like many runners -- have ever committed to upping your distance racing after finishing a race -- the first thing you think is, "I can do this!" So, since I'm on a forced running break until I start marathon training, Ive decided to do some legit research. I already know I'm using THIS Hal Higdon marathon plan, so that's been settled :)

Call me a nerd, it's ok.
 I prefer to call it interested, desire to be prepared, super excited.....wanting to be able to run as comfortably and successfully as I can. And lets face it...26.2 miles of running doesn't make me think of ease or comfort :) However, I've been reading about macros and how to eat to run more efficiently. It's really interesting! To me, maybe (and probably) not to you. 

Another thing I'm doing is looking at potential gear I may need (or really want):

- My running belt water bottles are falling out. Ugh. Looking into why and how to get that under control...I really don't want to buy a new one. My dad got me this one, and I know they're around $50 bucks. I'm down to one water bottle since I lost one during the Fargo half. *annoyed* But I'd much rather buy a replacement bottle than a whole new belt, if I can guarantee it won't fall out. I currently have a Nathan's hydration belt (Speed 2).

- Compression socks/sleeves? I've seen a lot of info supporting wearing these. I don't want to shell out the dough, but will do some research and buy them if need be. Any suggestions or tips are welcome and encouraged :) 

- I'm gonna need some more Brandy bands :) Love those things <3

- cold gear -- I'm pretty much positive that it's going to be pretty cold early October in Minnesota -- so I may invest in a new cold gear outfit. I have a great pair of UA coldgear compression tights that I've worn for about two years. I would love another pair. :) Also, since discovering 6 PM I can justify buying it when it's cheaper than at Dick's :)

My sweet Dad just got me some new running socks (my favorite Thorko's Experia socks) that will be perfect for my long runs throughout the summer. Thanks Daddy-o! 

Luckily, Michelle lives just outside of the city, and has graciously opened her home -- and Kelly has a friend that lives there, too. ANDDD I don't want to speak too soon but I may have some family present, too. :)

Pre-race worship service?!  UMMM that sounds awesome! Good ole Midwest <3

SPOILER ALERT: Until my intern starts, pretty much all my posts will be about running and my Texas vacay coming up. #sorryimnotsorry
I'm SOOOO excited to go home for a much needed visit! My baby brother is graduating high school -- weirddd but fun :) Ready to party with the fam and celebrate all our blessings <3 

Traverse City: Bayshore Half Marathon Photo Dump

Hey guys!! Here to recap my fun weekend in Traverse City! For those of you that don't know, Traverse City is in northern Michigan (about 4 hours north from the Lansing area) on Lake Michigan, known for wineries, cherries, and beautiful lake views. And I'm sure the trees are stunning in the fall. Anywayyyy The Bayshore Marathon, half, and 10k is super popular and the spots sell out so fast. I got up at 8AM on registration day in order to be able to race it. It's no joke. So, Friday I drove to Grand Rapids to meet Kelly and we drove up. It was a beautiful drive! 

Pack light? What's that mean?

On our way :) 

So we got there and immediately got our race stuff together for Saturday morning. We had to get up early (4:20A) so we wanted to be ready! 

Kelly had some work friends who were running the race too, but were staying at the campsite next door to our hotel, so Friday night we went there and hung out/ate/laughed. It was really chilly so the fire was perfect.

It was STILL chilly Saturday morning. Like low 30s. Getting up and standing around for an hour and a half before our race started was not fun. We whined a bit (not a shock).

Yay the sun came out and was SUPER bright. I think this is a great look for us, agreed?

This was our view for basically the whole race -- and it was stunning.

We finished the race on the Traverse City Central track which was kinda cool. The post-race treats included: cherry ice cream (Moomers), homemade cookies, chocolate milk, bagels....and the kitchen sink :)

Driving up the peninsula!

Old Mission Lighthouse

Grand Traverse Chateau winery

Obsessed.

What a view :)

Post-race celebratory wine tasting!

We took about a million of these. For your sake I'm only posting one.

Saturday night s'mores!

Sunday we went to breakfast (feeling FAMISHED) and walked around downtown TC before heading home. It was suchhhh a great weekend. I finally got to see a part of Michigan people love.

Someone was happy to have me home :)

Soooo --- as we watched the marathoners finish, Kelly and I said,"You know...I used to want to do a marathon..but now, no. There's no way..." Apparently that lasted about an hour...because now..

this.is.happening. 

SAY WHAT?!
Yep. It's official. We have decided to do the Twin Cities Marathon October 6th. I've got my training schedule all finished, and will start next weekend with an 8 mile run. I'm using Hal Higdon's Novice 2 marathon training plan, and just ordered a book called The New Rules for Marathon and Half Marathon Nutrition: A Cutting-Edge Plan to Fuel Your Body Beyond "the Wall" by Matt Fitzgerald.

Happy training :)

All Things Fargo...You Betcha!

Well well well --- here I am, back in Lansing. Boo hiss.

Recap of my trip:
1. Arrived on Thursday to BEAUTIFUL weather (Thanks Fargo), and of course, my handsome man. 

We went to lunch and I had some Mexi. I normally wouldn't mention this, however I haven't had Mexican food since JANUARY, and it happens to be my favorite cuisine when eating out. YUM. I loved every bite. I didn't get to nap on the plane, so getting up at 3:50 made for a longgggg day. However, getting there early was totally worth it. So, I finished up the day by working in the yard, as M is refinishing his basement, and had some outside tasks to do since he knew rain was coming. I even got my very own lady work gloves -- ladies, he is quite the charmer ;)

2. Friday I went to the Fargo Go Far Marathon expo, and of course, I was in running heavennnn. They had THE cutest shirts! I really had to restrain myself from buying everything, and since the two shirts I loved didn't have my size, I left empty handed, which was probably for the best. But, I got a million sample things, including C4 pre-workout powder that I've really been wanting to try. I'll test it out and blog about it later. So, next time I'm there I will be hitting up Swanson's because they had lots of freebies and I fell in love with this shampoo and conditioner I tried out.

(Boston love)

3. Saturday. RACE DAYYYYY! I started my morning as I always do pre-race. 16 oz of water, PB, banana, and one cup of coffee. Kate and I got up bright and early and M dropped us off at 6:30 AM to get ready. He didn't complain once about getting up early or sacrificing his time when he wanted to be at the lakes. Very sweet. Anyway...

 Kate and I stretched after she doctored my hellacious blisters with Second Skin, bandaids, and wraps on BOTH feet (I think my shoes aren't right or something). Anyway, once she tamed the monsters, I was good to go and super ready. I also ran into one of my fave IG friends, Jodi and her daughter!

 She was training for her first half and we ran into each other pre-race -- love the running IG community, and I think the fact that ND is super friendly helps too :) Anyway, that was super fun and added to the race excitement!

Readyyy to run like the ND winds!

So, Kate and I finished pre-race stuff and lined up. I found my 2:00:00 pace group and started the race strong, despite the rain and a bathroom pit stop (ugh). 

I'm somewhere in here. 

After mile 5, I decided to split from my pace group, because the rain had stopped and I was feeling great. So, I picked up my pace from 9:08 to probably about 8:30 until I hit 10 miles. I saw M twice early on, and again with his dad at mile 10 -- which was so fun as I've not had any family or friends at any other races yet! Such a great supporter. So, I ran quickly my last mile and a half..I don't even know how fast....and I ended up finishing 1:57:22. Under my 2:00:00 goal!!!

yeahhhhhhh!! 

So, the Fargo half was a HUGE success. So blessed and thankful for this body I've been given. I can't help but give Thanks throughout each major race or run. I'm truly blessed with so much. 

Post Race -- waiting for the first full finisher.

Post-race 2

 4. I stretched it out and spent the afternoon/night in Detroit Lakes with perfect weather and fun company.

View from Craig's boathouse. Love it. 

5. Then, M, his sister and I (and Duke!) went to "the farm" to see their grandparents -- and that was just the cutest day ever. :) Seriously. That's the only way to describe it. 

On the land behind the house

Sibs + Duke! 

Had such a fun time visiting. It was the last nice weather day we had there, too. 

Other than that, we relaxed together and spent time with his family. 

Please send some prayers, He knows the need. Thanks in advance ❤

Ready to rock the Bayshore this weekend! Recap for Race #2 to follow!